Just Gotta Grieve a Little

Thank you my beloved blogger friends for bearing with me these past few days (actually, it has been one week exactly). It has been a horrific one. Not only did the father of a man who is like a brother pass away on the morning of the 10th, I received a call on the 11th that the son of yet another one of my co-workers (2 years younger than my own 25-year-old daughter) was found dead that morning by his father, who had tried to wake him up for work (out-of-state).

I try really hard to keep promises that I make, and I kept looking at my Series posts so I could add to them and just had no words to type. I couldn’t focus. I don’t have it in me to talk about my journey right now. I’m not trying to be selfish at all. I still want to share it with all of you. It’s a journey I’m very proud of, considering where I am now as opposed to where I was. I just need a few more days; as wonderful as you have all been with me since I started this blog, I hope you can understand.

All I’d done for the past week is cry and mourn. I cried for my friend who lost his dad and hasn’t handled the loss well. He could barely function on the day of the wake. Afterwards, I offered my shoulders, my ears and as many hugs as he wanted while we packed his bags for his international flight that would take his dad home to his final resting place.

I cried and mourned for my friend who lost her son so suddenly; I can’t even fathom that loss. I panic at the very thought. Parents are not supposed to outlive their children and yet it happens all too often. This young man left two adorable twins, a little boy and a little girl.  The wake for this young man was the same day as my friend’s dad, so I couldn’t make it; plus it was not in NJ. There was a memorial held yesterday, which I very much wanted to attend. Unfortunately, my body was in a lot of pain the night before and into the next day. I slept fitfully throughout the night and even my friend (another co-worker), who was going to be my ride, didn’t think it was a good idea for me to go. Deep down, I know he’s right because I would have been much less likely to be able to contain my emotions properly, even if my body wasn’t acting up. Plus, I’m a mother; a mother with a daughter only a year older than her son was. No way would I have handled that well. No way at all.

Anyway, thanks for listening today. I’m glad to be back and happy that I was able to ‘grieve’ just a bit here with you. Before I go to bed tonight, I’m going to say some extra prayers and maybe even read a bit from my Bible. Everyday, I realize more and more how much I have to be thankful for.

Until next post, love you guys!